“Keep moving forward; opening new doors, doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”
– Walt Disney
In some ways I love this time of year and in some ways it drives me crazy. I love new beginnings and setting intention for where I want to go. But it’s also sometimes a stark reminder of the past intentions I’ve set and didn’t make. The goals I set out to crush and instead were crushed by them. The voice in my head screaming I told you so.
The voice telling me to stay small. The voice telling me I shouldn’t reach so far, because I’ll never make it. I’ve failed before, what makes this time different? What has changed?
Me. I’ve changed.
I was once a girl who hated failure. I would wither under the crushing disappointment and lower my head in defeat.
Pieces of that girl, I’m sure, still live in me. Maybe they always will. But as my own loving husband points out, I give up to easily. I’m quick to throw in the towel and switch gears to try something else. I see this now.
So this year I’m setting new intentions but from a whole new perspective. I know what I love and I know how I can have a positive influence on those around me.
This year is about motherhood in all it’s glory!
My heart sinks over every story I hear of postpartum depression or depression at all in mothers. I know how hard this motherhood gig is, but I also know that when we’re left alone we will be crushed under the weight of it. It’s only when we pull together and support one another that the load is lighter.
Laundry, poopy diapers, whiny children, homework, no sleep, your chauffeur status, trying to be a good spouse, taking a shower, cooking dinner, dishes, keeping the house from completely falling apart, managing the schedule, watering the damn house plants, getting the dog a walk, school tours to know where your kindergarten will go in 2 years, changing out the seasons clothes, clothes that are to small go to the neighbor, crap the fridge is empty again, when was the last time I swept the floor, or shaved my legs?
This list, the gritty parts of motherhood can bury you alive. I know I’ve felt the weight and at times the waves have consumed me. I’ve struggled to keep my head above water.
But I also know that’s not the whole story. There’s so much more and it’s the other part that makes that long list of exhausting duties worth everything.
It’s the joy and the heart that gets lost first. This year I want to bring that joy and heart back to the spot light. Yes you will still have all those duties, but now they’ll feel lighter. The joy and heart will be present in everything. The waves will be less crushing and your own feet lighter.
This year I want to photograph 30 Mamahood Sessions. It’s a big goal when I only work part time. But a goal I know is worth my perseverance.
I want to kick off this goal with brand new moms. New moms with babes that are weeks to a couples months old.
In the coming weeks, I’ll be sharing more on what these sessions will look like. But for now I want you to imagine what it felt like to bring your first baby home. What was your birth story? What were those first few weeks like? Do you remember? It’s so hazy isn’t it?
xoxo – Rachael
If you’d like to be one the first mama’s to sign up this year email me at firstname.lastname@example.org