I Am Willing To Let Go.
I am willing to let go.
The bottles of creams, piles of pillows, the eerie sound of a breast pump, and a hungry baby unwilling to wait even a moment to fill her tummy.
There was a system that had to be done every time we nursed. I remember thinking with fear of even leaving the house because I wouldn’t have my ‘nest’ as Cody called it.
It honestly terrified me.
I wanted breast feeding to be so perfect. So natural.
Shouldn’t it be?
But it wasn’t. It was so hard those first few weeks. We forget that every mama has a struggle of some kind.
It’s not all perfect.
The stress of perfect was drowning out all the really amazing parts.
The soft baby smell and snuggles.
The coos and yawns of a new little human.
So I let go of perfect.
I let go to find our version of perfect.
And it got easier. Each passing day it got easier.
And I started to see the beauty right there for the taking.
The beauty in the present moment.
Even now I have to remind myself to let go of perfect.
I am willing to let go.
A life long lesson.
xoxo – Rachael
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