16 months…going on 16 years.
Yet another huge agonizing moan escaped her lips. A sound that was closer to life is just so unfair and hard!
I debated going into her room knowing that it was probably for nothing.
“She’s only 16 months, is it really possible to be so dramatic already?”
All day long, the moan continued. Until I honestly thought I was going to loose my mind.
I hate drama. It’s an energy that exhausts me to my core.
I even had a sign in college that said, ‘check your drama at the door.’
By 4pm I was cranky, hot, and a tad hormonal.
Just deciding what to make for dinner sounded like climbing Mt. Everest. Take out anyone?
Instead I sat with my feet in the kiddie pool while D played naked, because jumped in earlier fully clothed.
Biking to Jazz in the Park even sounded tempting, for the simply pleasure of an easy dinner beside a food truck.
Thankfully Cody saw my weariness and took over.
Shortly after D went to bed, I sat on the couch and contemplated the day.
How did I let it get so under my skin?
Was she cranky first or was I?
I’m sure this is just the beginning, how can I possible get a grip and not loose my sh*t?
I read THIS article on Zen Habits this morning.
I try to tell myself often that we’re teaching our children, not disciplining them.
It’s a change in perspective I need to keep calm and present to the situation.
I know we’re just getting warmed up to really teaching, and I know D will push every button possible.
It’s kinda their job, right?
Yesterday was a huge reminder to keep my own emotions and hot button issues in check.
Today is a new day.
She’s still moaning occasional, but now I feel like I’m prepared.
Ready to stand strong against the wind and rain.
I’ll grow and learn right along with her.
xoxo – Rachael
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